As men, we pretty much know how we sexually feel about a woman the moment we lay our eyes of desire upon her.
Yep.
Before a man ever opens his mouth and says "Hello...," we instantly know whether she is sexually compatible or not. As men, it's a natural instinct of ours. We are born with that trait. Just as a woman is born with the ability to effortlessly match a pair of designer boots with a designer purse, a man possess the undeniable gene which, upon first glance, sends a signal to his cerebrum which, in turn, feeds this information to his brain. It's a male thang.
Or what's commonly known as, "a hard on."
It's not rocket science either. It's rather simple. If the woman isn't on drugs, able to carry a conversation and bathe at least once a day ... hey, that's even better. And don't let us find out she makes a killer macaroni & cheese or banana pudding. If so, then it's off to momma's house we go.
Ring the alarm, we have a winner.
But I am curious to know when exactly, at what point, does the woman know she's going to sleep with that particular man?
Yep.
Before a man ever opens his mouth and says "Hello...," we instantly know whether she is sexually compatible or not. As men, it's a natural instinct of ours. We are born with that trait. Just as a woman is born with the ability to effortlessly match a pair of designer boots with a designer purse, a man possess the undeniable gene which, upon first glance, sends a signal to his cerebrum which, in turn, feeds this information to his brain. It's a male thang.
Or what's commonly known as, "a hard on."
It's not rocket science either. It's rather simple. If the woman isn't on drugs, able to carry a conversation and bathe at least once a day ... hey, that's even better. And don't let us find out she makes a killer macaroni & cheese or banana pudding. If so, then it's off to momma's house we go.
Ring the alarm, we have a winner.
But I am curious to know when exactly, at what point, does the woman know she's going to sleep with that particular man?
Is there something in particular a man has to say or do which reveals the key to your anti-panties and bra lock? Do women have a 12-step program which the man has to unknowingly complete before he is invited to experience or taste the goodies? (money shot - 00:49 seconds into the video).
Is there some mental boot camp we have to attend before the woman, while standing in the bathroom mirror getting all sexy and cute for the date tonight, knows from the very moment she walks out the door that she will be dessert?
In other words, at what point does the woman stop playing The Dating Game? Honestly. And please don't give me that "when I fall in love with him."
What does love have to do with dating?
56 comments:
I'm the first. Well sir, it takes more than a handsome face and nice bod because I guess I'm older and wiser...so many questions pop up before making that decision...if by chance the condom slips, would I want this man to be my baby's daddy...do I want to play russian roulette and end up with a deadly disease...what do I know about this man except for the fact he got my temperature rising...am I looking for long term or short term...if long term, why in the world would I do temporary gratification (with no guarantee he can deliver)...and the questions go on and on.
Don, when the last time you had some????
lol @ attorneymom's question.
the dating game never ends..I believe even beyond dating its still a game. The intensity of the game varies, but game nonetheless.
For the more matured, it gets frustrating. that bitch "game" is going to get her ass kicked if I see her at the mall.
Even with all "17 mistakes women do" on KiKi's post y'all are still down for the throw down.
I hate slick smooth talking guys, but great conversation does it for me.
It's not the one thing he says, but the many things we talk about, so if he can get inside my head and eff me mentally to the point where I'm really feeeeeeeeling him, then pretty much he can get the panties.
Being older and wiser...it takes much more than the outter to get me...yes its nice.. but I need much more.
I have been celibate for 15mos now...so if I were to give it up... geez......
But really.. I know my worth and I am preserving my treasure for that special someone.... I hate feeling vulnerable..so one of my things is... I need to feel secure with this person....
But to answer your question Don.... yes, the man would need to meet a lot of prequisties before we even go there....
To be transparent.. I have an imagination out of this world.... you fill in the blanks!! LOL
@sheila, I hear everything you're saying, I really do. You make wise points. But you don't believe in sometimes ending a perfect date on a perfect note? lol.
@attorneymom, um, when was the last time you had some? lol. Seriously, the last time I had meaningful sex was Valentines Day. Last time I had sex umm...you first.
@sheletha, I've never looked at it like that. But you definitely have a point. When I think about it, it really doesn't end. And probably shouldn't. Keep things spicy
@diva, see that's real talk. If he puts in the amount of work it takes. Reward that man. I'm just saying.
@ticia, lol, so the man has to take up a few college courses? Seriously, 15 months...wow! That's whats up. I can't even imagine going 15 months without sex. You sure your stuff is still down there? lol. Being vulnerable definitely sucks. Especially when the person is acting funny.
Alright Don, I will weigh in on this one.
To be honest I am not one of those women who waits to sleep with I man I find sexually attractive. The thing is that for me personally I am driven contact and touch. If I am digging the dude I dont hop right into the sack but I slept with a dude after 3 months in some cases and on the first date in others. It depends. And it is a game at first. But what ends the game for a lot of women I know, myself included is a kind of check list. We get practical when the time comes. Love is fine but you cant eat it or live in it so...
job-check
decent ideals and morals-check
some sort of basis of faith--check (necessarily religious but you know a moral compass)
lives alone-check
decent credit--check
Then we figure in the kids from a previous relationship aspect and the baby mamma aspect and make our move.
and additionally for me I need a dude who can stand serious QUIRKS.
how bout this.
Most women know if they gonna give a nikka some from the first time they see him.
fux wit it . ::lol::
once again you got me speechless. Just speechless........
Don...its here.. LOL---
It works too.... just waiting for the right thing....
hmmmm, i have an issue w/ the choice of words: sexually compatible. I knew 1 too many who was willing to have sex with me - but SADLY it was NOT compatible...
still trying to figure out the secret to finding out if we'll be compatible ...while we're still dressed...HENCE the SHUT DOWN 2 yrs & counting....*HUGE sighhh*
I'm with Amboogie!
Told ya'll I think I was supposed to be a boy.LOL I KNOW I wanna give a man some soooon as I lay eyes on him.
Com'mon ladies! NONE of ya'll have ever seen a man & at first glance just thought..."I would f*ck the SHYT outta him!"
Maybe it's just me & my twisted azz thinkin again...LOL
"you don't believe in sometimes ending a perfect date on a perfect note? lol."
Don, if it's someone I just met or "just dating" without no committments, the answer would be "NO."
it's not just you Kiki. LOL - trust!
lol Kiki, I've met some men where I've thought about it, but would never act on it.
@kiki, lmao @ your comment. Real talk.
@sheila, you mean to tell me - if that man shows you a good time whether that be going to see Tyler Perry and dinner, good laughs and chemistry, maybe sit and have good conversation with him afterwards...you wouldn't invite him to stay the night? You aint got to love or marry him! lol
I wouldnt either Don. Just because I think he's working with a little something, doesn't mean he gets this on the first night. Nope, not happening.
All you guys put your best foot forward on the first date, so nuh uh...he's getting a hug and "thank you I had a great time" as I go home...ALONE!
Wait what Don?
He cant have a
job
morals
and aight credit?
Come on now. He do the bare minimum for sho! Those 3 things are what moves a man into the more than dating area. If he come with those min requirements the women generally upgrade him from there...
If those qualifications are too much then what is acceptable for a man to come with?
When do we know????.....The same time as men do, for me at least that has always been the case. Especially if you are hungry for him already because he looks good or smells good, is tall with a nice smile. There is always an initial attraction that will tell your body physically that you want to do the nasty. It’s called chemistry. We know though...we know when we are getting dressed by the type of spray we use, to the type of panties we wear. Love should not be associated with dating, dating is a way of creating a compatible companionship. Its sort of the appetizer before the meal per se
Funny. I was just talking about this with a gf over drinks last night. I'm not like a lot of women, particularly those my age. For me, when I meet a man and he has the "basics" going for him and if the attraction is strong, I know almost immediately whether I will let him get the nappy dugout (as Jilly from Philly calls it :) So I'm just praying that he doesn't say or do anything stupid to eff it up and turn me off before I decide to get on with it. Hell, I want it too and am not afraid to admit that! So when will that magic moment be? Just depends on when I'm feeling it. It's happened on the first night and I had no regrets. Actually turned into a longterm relationship. I follow my instincts which have never steered me wrong. If they happen to, at least I will have gotten some great sex (hopefully) and some good dates out of it. Keep it moving!
Don...did u "hear" anything else i said? lol! yep...basically...had a coupla play-arounds - but no full fledged fulfillment...
used to think like that Kiki & Amboogie...but then a coupla disappointments proved the old folx right - everything that glitters ain't ... packin' - LOLOL (i can laugh now;-)!
If we are going on a date...more than likely I have already decided that you could get it...not to be confused with him actually getting it.
Now granted, I'm good for making a dude wait...but that's just me being an ass with the mind games. Yea...I can be likes that some times.
..back to point...if I have deemed you worthy of even having a date with me...then more than likely I can see us rubbing nappies.
...so since I can makemac n cheese and banana pudding from scratch...I'mma catch? Men look for so little...when you can have so much more...*huge sigh* LOL
Com'mon ladies! NONE of ya'll have ever seen a man & at first glance just thought..."I would f*ck the SHYT outta him!"
I got your back girl!!!!
Yes, Kiki---
I do.. I do..... but its a fleeting thought.. A girl has got to imagine... LOL---
Ok...I was startin to think I was crazy! LOL Good lookin out, Poca!
And just for clarification...just because I know I wanna give him some, doesn't mean I act on it (that day anyway)!
looka here looka here...loved the post, brah.
they know...nuff said!
yes i will admit there have been plenty of brothers who have umm made my cooch jump. If you can make it jump you can get it for sure. Times are different and women should have the right to sleep on the first date without being called a slut. I would prefer the term sexually liberated. No one could make me feel different. Ladies if you see a Fine and I mean Idris Elba fine, and you wanna jump his bones I say set it off. Now if his package is coming up short atleast you wouldn't have wasted months getting to know him, only to find out he is sorry in bed
*singin* "What's love got to do, got to do with it . . .what's love, but a second hand emotiooooon." LOL
That's a good question.
^5 Lea78!
SET-IT-OFF!!!
Don, the answer is still no...I can treat myself...so a man doing that for me doesn't make him special...it takes more than that to get these goodies :)
I didn't read all the comments, I got to the part where you said about "perfect date on a perfect note"
My questions is who says giving up the panties is a perfect ending? If the evening is perfect there will be other times, no one lets something perfect end just cause they don't end up vertically.
And is the ending perfect when she ends up with a disease? or at the very least catches feelings and he is already taken?
Why can't Perfect ending be "It was nice I am feeling you, I would like to, but lets see where this goes?"
Hate to burst ya bubble but ummm women do the same damn thang Don.
I mean...we might'nt broadcast that shyt [or look all thirsty up in the face like y'all men do -- LOL] but we've definitely sized a brotha up and have determined whether or not y'all can/will eventually get it [in most instances], at first glance or at least, within minutes of.
PLEASE BELIEVE IT!!
Okay so, do you mean, "when do women know we are gonna have sex with a particular guy?"
The answer is 'Right Away.' But due to socialization, religion, bad past experiences, fear of bad rep, disease and rape, we slow down, think it over and make yall wait. The stakes (for most women) are just too high.
In a perfect world, we'd have no racism, equal pay for equal work, free and available sex education, birth control and universal health care for all women and children, including the poor, immigrant and women of color.
In real life, we have the Dating Game.
We know before you do...
My name is banana puddin’ and I CAN make mac n cheese (not kraft) hey Ima catch!
Sometimes it’s the booze. With my ex it was the moment. And sometimes, like your hard on, I know we are NEVER going to sleep together lol sorry * tear *
I recently went on a date and we shared a $165 meal, he paid for. That helped, some…
Why wassup Don? Are you dating someone?
congratulations on making the blogger's delight book. all the best in the future.
I haven't read all of your comments (b/c u have too damn many! Haha) so I may be echoing others...but whateva.
I know right away if I want to give him my goodies too, but as you mentioned there is a mini mental boot camp that can keep you in the game or knock you out.
Since I'm no expert on this subject. Let's turn to my lady "Baby at what point, does the woman know she's going to sleep with a particular man"
Shawnla responds " Its how they look to me and their sex appeal. Great conversation is a coochie grabber. If dude has that combination especially on the first date he just might get it, but since I'm a lady I fight those carnal urges"
Their you have it...
I am a person that runs on vibes. If we're vibin then I know that the male has the chance at getting it.It's his actions that determine the sliding off of the panties.
There are times when I say "I would drop it like it's hot on the muthafucka right there!" But the guy could say or do something that could change that thought in seconds.
I know if I would give it up, but it doesn't mean that I will. And I want a guy to want me, so even if I'm ready to go, I'll wait until he pulls my panties off with his teeth:)
When I'm dressing for the date I'll either choose a lovely matching underwear set or the granny panties and the industrial bra.
The granny panties are my guarantee that nothing sexual will happen. The matching set leaves the possibility of wild monkey sex wide open.
I don't equate sexuality with morality or goodness. If it's right it's going to happen. If I want someone, the only reason for delay is to increase the anticipation - I love the dance. Great conversation is the best part of that.
I haven't had sex for a couple of months now - I'm still getting over the end of a great relationship and I'm not ready yet.
I don't get the concept of "give it up". Isn't the man sharing as much of himself as the woman? I reject any who judge me based on the length of time involved before carnal knowledge - if that's someone's mindset, then they're not worthy of me.
Blogger won't let me post using my current wordpress ID. Arrrgh!
jalishouse.wordpress.com
I'm older and more sexually aware of what I want. Finally no more sexual frustration and offing myself. I digress. I am very site motivated in my mature age. Just. Like. Men. Are. Hence, my lack of attraction to the one I'm married to. Again, digressing. And for the women who are all scientific on this subject I would like to ask them to try this test. If you can name at least one TV/media personality that you don't know personally (read: Hollywood star) who could "get it," then you too don't need good food, fun, conversation, blah, yada to relate to me, Kiki, Don and the few other masses on here who've 'fessed to laying eyes on desire and allowing "pipe" to be laid, off the rip. Pun intended.
My top can't-get-it list:
*Columbus Short
*Terrance Howard
*Mekhi Phifer
*Djimon Hounsou
*Morris Chestnut
*Trick Daddy (his nasty lyrics make my shit twitch; and I might cal his ass "Daddy" during the act and I normally don't go for callin no man my damn daddy)
*Weezy F. Baby (okay, so I'm curious, but don't go calling me a Cougar)
*This local cat who shall remain nameless
*Insert at least one professional athlete, nicely built, first round pick; hell throw in Stephen A. Smith's ass for the ESPN-of-it*
That's ten off top, all but one whom I've never been privy to meet, but I'd get down--and--go down with 'em (not all at once, of course) in a New York minute. And that's fast as hell.
I'm horny. Now. Damn. . .
Don, woman have the same instincts that men have it just doesnt come in the form of a hard on. We know from the moment we see you, whether you have approached us or not whether or not we will sleep with you. There is nothing you can say or do to change that. I am the type to let a man know that calls me late night, yeah you can come over but you aint getting none. While on the phone everything is all good but when they get there its every trick in the book to try to get in my pants. Didnt I tell you before you got to my crib that you werent getting any. So why do you have an attitude. You could have stayed at home to save both of us the headache.
What's men realize that they have no control over this situation, and women make an appoint to be straight up with the man about their intentions, everyone will be better off.
Although, a man can sway how fast or long we wait to give it up by having an intriguing personality.
Phuck! I meant my top CAN GET IT List!
I have to agree with "Pro" all that yada yada sounds good but I'm just as good with mine as a guy. I know from jump if a guy has the potential to be a "hit" but yes after opening their mouth will determine if it will actually happen or not. PRO" also agreeing about the hubby situation (sigh)
Guys, females like to play games and that's just the bottom line and all that stuff about having to think about it, check your med records, checking account and so on is bull-ish, we're talkin sex, not marriage
~A~
~A~
Don, Don, Don--you need a girlfriend. :)
If a guy has a big enough bulge in his pants.. well then hey,that's good enough for me! I'm in love! :o)
well man, seems like we may have been seperated at birth my long lost twin, cause i see it the exact same way as u, but the ladies do have some valid points.
You ask the most uninhibitied questions without flinching. I am with Ambboogie, I can tell within a few minutes into the conversation if a man has a chance of worshipping in my temple. If I am not mentally stimulated, then he gets nothing. Not to say that they will get some, but they have a chance.
I have ran across several men who I would give it to if they just blew in my ear! lol I don't need the dinner or date!!! lol I have not acted on these feeling but I have had them! :)
I also agree with the lasies who say we know at the same time as the men.
I have come across men who have a certain swagger and my mind is blown away!
I have to run to the little girls room BRB!!! haha J/k
@opinionated diva, it doesn't have to be the first date
@femigog, I don't think you are going to get the complete truth while simply dating a man
@poca, I figured that. I know you. Look at me. I know you...lol
@dani girl, no doubt. So it's best the man say as little as possible if the woman feels him
@capcity, oh, i didn't hear you say that at first
@blah, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach. Trust me
@dc speaks, no doubt. They definitely KNOW
@lea, lol, make the cooch jump?
@aly cat, co-sign
@sheila, there's nothin wrong with making the man wait. I can respect that
@gurlnexxdoor, you have a point. Perfect ending could definitely mean a variety of things. I stand corrected
@ms behaving, please believe
@chezniki, I've never heard it put quite like you just put it
@prettyblack, no doubt
@MsP, kinda. so with you there is two kinds of banana pudding in store, right?
@bygpowis, Thanks for the kinds words, but I declined
@virtous, I would love to see you do a post on exactly what the boot camp is - in your own words
@mr slish (and shawnla), lol, there you have it. That was smooth bruh
@ladyshay, lol, with his teeth? Real talk
@jali, I don't equate it with morality either. I think if i did there would be no sex
@pro, I definitely feel you. Matter of fact, i am talking slave toy - at first anyway. Sanaa, Meagan Good, umm Kobe bryant's wife, Malinda Williams, to name a few. On sight action!
@ebonne, as you can see, not every woman makes it a point to be str8 up. You neither...lol
@andrea, so a guy has to be very careful about opening his mouth and messing everything up. I think I did that two days ago...lol
@saadia, once I get a true grasp on this single life, maybe I will be able to find the "right one"
@ponderings, lol
@torrance, no doubt my brother. Oh yeah, I have your book. Give me a minute to get to it though
@queen, you have those intimidating and bedroom eyes. If a man has a chance, and turns around and messes that up. He's a fool
@sexyy, blown into your ear...lol That's real. Don't nut on yourself babygirl
For me I know when I see a guy if I would just fuck him or if he could be a potential relationship partner. But to get to your question. Once I trust him to a certain degree I'll stop playing games and have sex with him and in order to trust someone you have to have spent time with them.
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